Able to Care

The Science of Negativity Bias: Practical Tools for Caregivers, Teachers, and Parents

🎙️ In this solo episode of the Able to Care Podcast, host Andy Baker dives into the topic of negative thinking — why our brains are wired to focus on threats, criticism, and worst-case scenarios, and how we can train ourselves to see the positive.
We all know the feeling: ten compliments in a day, and we still can't stop thinking about that one bit of criticism. But it's not a flaw — it's evolution. Andy explores the science behind our negativity bias, its impact on self-esteem, caregiving, relationships, and behaviour management, and most importantly, how to shift it.
Whether you’re a parent, teacher, or caregiver, this episode is a practical guide to rewiring your mindset, boosting your confidence, and supporting others more effectively.
💡 Sponsor Message:This episode is proudly sponsored by Carers Card UK – the UK’s number one carers card offering discounts, support, and recognition for those who dedicate their lives to caring for others.
Carers Card UK provides:
Discounts on gyms, days out, tech, clothing, glasses, and more
Access to a wellbeing hub and Carers Circle app
A trusted ID card that lets others know you care – while helping you care for yourself
All for less than the price of a box of chocolates per year.👉 Visit carerscarduk.co.uk/promo-code/abletocare to get yours today!
🧠 Key Topics Covered in This Episode:
🧬 Why Our Brains Are Wired to Spot the NegativeUnderstand the evolutionary roots of negativity bias — and why it made sense when survival meant avoiding lions, not emails.
🪞 How Negativity Shapes Self-EsteemWhy we're so quick to spot our flaws, and how perfectionism and self-criticism hold us back.
💬 Impact on Relationships and CommunicationHow constant criticism – of ourselves or others – can weaken connections and reduce motivation.
🔁 Reframing and RealignmentPowerful strategies for shifting perspective, using praise, noticing the good, and creating behavioural change.
📝 Practical Mindset ToolsFrom gratitude journaling to the “3 wins a day” rule – tools to train your brain to focus on what’s going right.
🧒 Supportive Feedback in Care and EducationWhy spotting and naming the positives in others builds trust, resilience, and behavioural change.
💬 Key Takeaways:
✅ Negativity isn’t weakness — it’s wiring. But it can be challenged.✅ The stories we tell ourselves about failure shape how we show up for others.✅ You can’t catch someone doing it right if you don’t know what “right” looks like.✅ Ending your day with 3 wins rewires your brain for balance, not blind optimism.✅ Praise changes behaviour more than punishment ever will.
📚 Further Resources:
Targeting the Positive – Andy’s book on understanding and managing behaviour
Able Hub – Courses and resources for carers, educators and parents: ablehub.uk
⏳ Timestamps:
[00:00] – Why criticism sticks more than praise[01:49] – Sponsor: Carers Card UK[02:15] – What is negativity bias and why do we have it?[04:31] – How it impacts relationships and how we see ourselves[07:08] – How criticism affects your mindset and behaviour[08:12] – The power of journaling and celebrating your wins[09:00] – Using positive reinforcement to drive behavioural change[10:34] – Don’t assume intent – a better way to understand difficult behaviour[11:20] – Labeling, stereotypes and catching people doing it right[12:14] – Reframing challenging moments as growth opportunities[14:57] – Three wins a day – a mindset shift for carers, parents and professionals[17:06] – Why optimism helps us live longer[17:28] – Acceptance and Commitment Therapy – the “blue sky” above the storm[17:47] – Final thoughts and a challenge for you
📲 Connect with Us!🔗 Instagram: @AbleToCarePodcast🔗 LinkedIn: @AbleTraining🔗 TikTok: @AbleToCare🔗 Website: AbleHub.uk
🎧 Subscribe & Share!If this episode helped you see things a little differently, please subscribe, leave a review, and share it with someone who needs to hear it.Let’s build a community where we challenge the bias and catch the good – in ourselves and each other.

Online Extremism, Identity, and Safeguarding: How to Protect Young Minds

🎙️ In this episode of the Able to Care Podcast, host Andy Baker speaks with safeguarding and Prevent specialist Sabera to explore radicalisation, online extremism, and how we can better protect and empower young people.
Together, they unpack what Prevent and Channel really are, how the safeguarding model works, and why early intervention is crucial. They dive deep into online grooming, far-right and incel movements, violent misogyny, and why understanding history, identity, and values matters more than ever.
This conversation is essential for teachers, carers, parents, and anyone supporting young people in today’s fast-changing world.
💡 Sponsor Message: This episode is sponsored by Carers Card UK – the UK’s leading carers card providing support, discounts, and community for paid and unpaid carers.
Enjoy access to:
Discounts on shopping, gym memberships, days out, glasses, and more
A wellbeing hub and community app
An ID card offering pride, recognition, and access to emergency info
💳 Take care of yourself while you care for others – visit carerscarduk.co.uk/promo-code/abletocare to order yours.
📝 Key Topics Covered:
🔍 What Is Prevent and Channel Really About?Sabera explains how Channel panels work and how early intervention can help safeguard individuals at risk of radicalisation.
⚖️ Safeguarding, Not Policing:Why Prevent isn’t about blame or surveillance—but proactive, supportive interventions that protect vulnerable people.
🧠 Modern Extremism Explained:From violent misogyny and incels to far-right accelerationism and mixed ideologies—understanding the risks today’s youth face online.
🕸️ The Role of Online Platforms:Why educators and parents must stay informed about unmoderated online spaces like Discord, 4chan, and BitChute.
🌍 Identity, History, and Integration:Sabera and Andy discuss British values, shared history, and how identity and cultural understanding can foster inclusion.
📉 The Need for Nuanced Dialogue:Why civil discourse, safe spaces, and cultural education matter—and how both Prevent and society need to evolve with the times.
💬 Key Takeaways:
✅ Prevent and Channel are safeguarding tools—not punishment.✅ Radicalisation can affect anyone, from any background.✅ Extremism has evolved: misogyny, incel ideologies, and far-right rhetoric are on the rise.✅ Community, education, and connection are our best defences.✅ Storytelling, history, and human rights need more space in schools and society.
📚 Further Resources:
Act Early Campaign
Hope Not Hate
Able Hub – Resources for carers, parents, educators
Targeting the Positive – Andy Baker’s book on behaviour and connection
📲 Connect with Us! 🔗 Instagram: @AbleToCarePodcast🔗 LinkedIn: @AbleTraining🔗 TikTok: @AbleToCare🔗 Website: AbleHub.uk
🎧 Subscribe & Share!If this episode sparked something for you, please share it, leave a review, and help us build a more compassionate, informed community. Your voice matters.

Risk Aversion vs Resilience: How Managed Risk Builds Confidence in Children and Adults

🎙️ In this solo episode of the Able to Care Podcast, host Andy Baker unpacks the powerful – and sometimes harmful – role of risk aversion in caregiving, parenting, and education.
From overprotective instincts to the long-term consequences of shielding people from life’s challenges, Andy explores why positive risk-taking is crucial for building confidence, self-esteem, and resilience – whether you’re raising a child or supporting someone in care.
With powerful stories, psychological insights, and practical reflections, this is an essential episode for carers, teachers, and parents alike.
💡 Sponsor Message:This episode is proudly sponsored by Carers Card UK – the UK’s number one carers card offering discounts, support, and community connections for those who dedicate their lives to caring for others.
Whether you are a paid or unpaid caregiver, Carers Card UK provides valuable benefits such as:
Discounts on gym memberships, days out, electrical goods, clothing, and more
Access to a wellbeing hub, Carers Circle tool, and a supportive community through their app
An ID card that you can carry with pride
Let others know you care – while taking a little care of yourself.👉 Visit carerscarduk.co.uk/promo-code/abletocare to learn more and order your card today!
📝 Key Topics Covered in This Episode:
🚸 What Is Risk Aversion and Why Do We Do It?Understanding the instinct to protect – and the unintended consequences of overprotection.
🧗 The Value of Positive Risk-TakingFrom learning to walk to climbing trees, how overcoming small challenges builds confidence and resilience.
👶 Parenting & Caregiving: Are We Overprotecting?Why “better safe than sorry” can sometimes do more harm than good – and how to reframe it.
📉 The Cost of OverprotectionHow stunting risk-taking can lead to poor decision-making, low self-esteem, and lack of confidence later in life.
💪 Let Them Fall (Safely)How to manage risk instead of avoiding it entirely – and why letting kids (and adults) make mistakes is vital.
🏃 Real-Life Examples from Care, Childhood, and BeyondFrom riverside anxiety to elderly autonomy – Andy shares relatable stories about how overprotection shows up and how to challenge it.
🔥 Why Stress Isn’t the EnemyThe science behind positive stress, stepping outside your comfort zone, and redefining “danger” vs “discomfort.”
📚 Maslow’s Hierarchy and the Missing Piece: Feeling AliveExploring why some level of risk is essential for joy, purpose, and fulfilment – especially in later life.
🏫 The Playground Study That Changed EverythingA surprising story from a New Zealand school about why allowing children to play in “risky” environments actually reduced accidents and improved classroom behaviour.
💬 Key Takeaways:
✅ Eliminating all risk is impossible – but managing it builds life-long resilience.✅ Mistakes aren’t failures – they’re vital learning experiences.✅ Confidence comes from competence – which only comes from challenge.✅ Risk doesn’t mean recklessness – it means allowing growth.✅ Support without rescuing – let people explore, try, fail, and get back up again.
📚 Further Resources:
📖 Targeting the Positive with Behaviours That Challenge – Andy’s book on understanding behaviour and managing distress.
🌐 Able Hub – Access resources for carers, parents, and educators at ablehub.uk
🎁 Carers Card UK – Claim your carers card with the Able to Care podcast!
⏳ Timestamps:
[00:00] – Introduction: Are you protecting or preventing?[01:49] – Sponsor Message: Carers Card UK[02:22] – What is risk aversion and where does it show up?[03:33] – Risk in early childhood and walking as a metaphor[04:20] – How overprotection stunts development and self-esteem[05:34] – The “sofa” example from parenting books[06:42] – Risk and decision-making: learning through failure[07:14] – Social learning: anxiety is contagious[08:16] – Real-life story: riverside anxiety and overreaction[09:06] – Risk, aging, and the right to still feel alive[10:09] – Maslow’s hierarchy and the need for stimulation[10:55] – Debunking myths about stress[11:59] – Risk vs reward: discomfort leads to opportunity[13:00] – Positive risk-taking: strategies to support growth[13:58] – Mistakes as stepping stones: celebrate the process[14:17] – A New Zealand school’s bold experiment[15:36] – What the research revealed about learning through risk[16:44] – Final thoughts: let them climb the tree[17:30] – Who are you overprotecting? Encourage a small risk today[18:01] – Bonus message: About Andy’s book and behaviour toolkit
📲 Connect with Us!
🔗 Instagram: @AbleToCarePodcast🔗 LinkedIn: @AbleTraining🔗 TikTok: @AbleToCare🔗 Website: AbleHub.uk
🎧 Subscribe & Share!If this episode resonated with you, please subscribe, share, and leave a review.Let’s build a community where carers, teachers, and parents feel supported to take positive risks – for themselves and those they care for.

From the Care System to Changing It: Steve Baron on Reframing Social Work and Supporting Vulnerable Children

🎙️ In this episode of the Able to Care Podcast, host Andy Baker speaks with Steve Baron – a social worker, practice educator, and founder of Reframe Wandsworth.
Steve brings his powerful lived and professional experience into a conversation about the realities of growing up in care, being separated from siblings, and the emotional toll of the care system.
Together, Andy and Steve unpack what it really means to be trauma-informed – and why labels, procedures, and tick-box approaches often miss the mark when it comes to actually caring for children.
If you’re a carer, teacher, social worker, or someone who wants to better understand and support care-experienced young people, this is a vital listen.
💡 Sponsor Message:This episode is proudly sponsored by Carers Card UK – the UK’s number one carers card offering discounts, support, and community connections for those who dedicate their lives to caring for others.
Whether you are a paid or unpaid caregiver, Carers Card UK provides valuable benefits such as:
Discounts on gym memberships, days out, electrical goods, clothing, and more.
Access to a wellbeing hub, Carers Circle tool, and a supportive community through their app.
An ID card that you can carry with pride.
Let others know you care – while taking a little care of yourself. Visit carerscarduk.co.uk to learn more and order your card today!
📝 Key Topics Covered in This Episode:
🏚️ Growing Up in the Care System:Steve shares his personal experience of being in care, what was missing emotionally, and the long-term impact of early separation from his siblings.
💔 “Trauma-Informed” Isn’t Just a Buzzword:Why systems often fail to truly understand trauma – and how lived experience needs to inform practice, not just theory.
🔄 Reframing Social Work and Care:How Steve’s organisation, Reframe Wandsworth, is changing how professionals support care-experienced young people – with authenticity, empathy, and challenge.
🛠️ Supporting, Not Saving:The importance of avoiding saviour mindsets and truly listening to what care-experienced people need on their terms.
💬 Key Takeaways:
✅ Trauma-informed care starts with curiosity and empathy – not just training.✅ The system often labels children instead of understanding them.✅ Real change comes from relationship – not tick-boxes.
📚 Further Resources:
Reframe Wandsworth – reframewandsworth.co.ukAble Hub – Resources for carers, educators, and parents: ablehub.ukTargeting the Positive – Andy’s book on understanding and managing behaviour
⏳ Timestamps:
[00:00] – Introduction: Meet Steve Baron[02:05] – Steve’s childhood in care and sibling separation[05:45] – Why labels like “challenging behaviour” miss the real story[08:20] – What Steve wished adults understood back then[11:10] – Becoming a social worker – and bringing lived experience to the table[14:35] – Reframing what support really looks like[17:50] – The dangers of saviourism and assuming what’s “best”[20:10] – What trauma-informed should mean[23:15] – Steve’s hopes for how professionals can change the culture[26:00] – Final reflections and where to connect with Steve
📲 Connect with Us!🔗 Instagram: @AbleToCarePodcast🔗 LinkedIn: @AbleTraining🔗 TikTok: @AbleToCare🔗 Website: AbleHub.uk
🎧 Subscribe & Share!If this episode resonated with you, please subscribe, share it with someone who needs to hear it, and leave us a review. Together, we can challenge the narrative and care more effectively for those who need us most.

Boundaries That Build Trust: Why Caregivers, Parents & Professionals Need Them

In this episode of the Able to Care Podcast, host Andy Baker explores one of the most misunderstood tools in caregiving, parenting, and professional relationships: boundaries.
Are boundaries about control? Far from it. Andy breaks down how healthy boundaries build trust, predictability, and safety, both at home and at work. From the challenges of setting boundaries with loved ones to the importance of consistency in professional care settings, this episode is packed with practical advice for anyone supporting others.
Whether you're a carer, parent, teacher, or team leader, this episode will help you see boundaries not as restrictions, but as roadmaps that help everyone navigate relationships more safely and successfully.
💡 Sponsor Message:
This episode is proudly sponsored by Carers Card UK – the UK’s number one carers card offering discounts, support, and community connections for those who dedicate their lives to caring for others.
Whether you're a paid or unpaid caregiver, Carers Card UK provides valuable benefits including:
✅ Discounts on gym memberships, days out, electrical goods, clothing, and glasses.
✅ Access to a wellbeing hub, Carers Circle tool, and a supportive app-based community.
✅ An ID card you can carry with pride that also holds emergency info.
Let others know you care while taking a little care of yourself.🎟️ Visit Carers Card UK and order yours today using our promo link!
📝 Key Topics Covered in This Episode:
🧠 Why Boundaries Matter in Every Relationship:
How boundaries help us manage stress and protect relationships.
The difference between personal and professional boundaries.
Why boundaries aren’t about control – they’re about creating predictability and trust.
🛠️ Common Mistakes in Setting Boundaries:
Inconsistency: Saying “no” sometimes, but not always.
Using boundaries as punishment rather than guidance.
Forgetting to explain the “why” behind your boundaries.
📚 Real-World Examples and Tools:
What parenting and roller coasters have in common.
The “taps and drains” model of energy management.
When/then statements and how they reduce power struggles.
💬 Key Messages:
Boundaries Create Safety, Not Control:They aren’t walls — they’re roadmaps for connection, respect, and emotional regulation.
Consistency Builds Trust:Shifting boundaries cause confusion and pushback. Clear expectations help others feel secure.
Lead by Example:Your boundaries only work if you model them too — especially with children or those you care for.
⏳ Timestamps:
[00:00] – Introduction: The misunderstanding of boundaries[00:17] – Sponsor Message: Carers Card UK[01:45] – What boundaries look like in customer service and care roles[03:56] – Why professional boundaries matter in care settings[05:05] – Personal boundaries and the challenge of being a people-pleaser[06:21] – Taps and drains: Understanding energy flow in relationships[07:01] – Boundaries for emotional regulation and behavior[08:07] – The roller coaster analogy: Why kids test boundaries[09:43] – Boundaries in parenting vs permissiveness[11:01] – Rules don’t ruin fun — they make it possible[12:14] – Common mistakes with boundaries: inconsistency and power struggles[13:22] – “Because…”: The psychology behind explaining your reasoning[14:50] – Influence and fairness when setting rules[15:38] – How to set boundaries effectively: clarity, simplicity, calm enforcement[16:27] – Using when/then language and modelling behaviour[17:24] – Hypocrisy and leadership: Follow the rules you set[18:03] – Final thoughts: Boundaries as a fresh start[18:36] – Bonus: What is Able Hub and how it supports carers and educators
📚 Further Resources:
🔗 Able Hub – Access 45+ online courses, bonus podcast content, and a supportive care community.
📘 Targeting the Positive – Andy Baker’s book on behaviour and emotional regulation.
📲 Connect with Us!
🔗 Instagram: @AbleToCarePodcast
🔗 LinkedIn: @AbleTraining
🔗 TikTok: @AbleToCare
🌐 Website: AbleHub.uk
🎧 Subscribe & Share!
If you found this episode helpful, please subscribe, share, and leave a review to help more caregivers, educators, and parents discover how boundaries can improve relationships and reduce burnout.
Let’s create a community that supports and empowers each other.

Understanding Grooming and Childhood SA: A Survivor’s Story with Jeremy Indika

🎙️ In this episode of the Able to Care Podcast, host Andy Baker speaks with Jeremy Indika – a survivor of childhood sexual abuse and founder of Something to Say.
Jeremy bravely shares his story of being groomed as a child, the confusion and silence that followed, and why so many survivors don’t come forward until much later in life.
Together, Andy and Jeremy explore the myths around abuse, the challenges survivors face when seeking justice, and what carers, teachers, and professionals can do to better support those affected.
Whether you support children, teach, care for others, or want to understand more about trauma and healing, this is an essential listen.
 
💡 Sponsor Message:This episode is proudly sponsored by Carers Card UK – the UK’s number one carers card offering discounts, support, and community connections for those who dedicate their lives to caring for others.
Whether you are a paid or unpaid caregiver, Carers Card UK provides valuable benefits such as:
Discounts on gym memberships, days out, electrical goods, clothing, and more.
Access to a wellbeing hub, Carers Circle tool, and a supportive community through their app.
An ID card that you can carry with pride.
Let others know you care – while taking a little care of yourself. Visit carerscarduk.co.uk to learn more and order your card today!
📝 Key Topics Covered in This Episode:
🔇 Breaking the Silence on Childhood Sexual Abuse:Jeremy shares his personal story of abuse, the silence that followed, and the emotional confusion survivors often face.
🧠 Understanding Trauma Responses and Delayed Disclosure:How grooming works, why victims sometimes don’t see it as abuse at the time, and the long journey to finding words for what happened.
⚖️ Barriers to Justice & Why Survivors Stay Silent:From lack of evidence to emotional shutdown – Jeremy and Andy discuss the painful reality of reporting abuse and being believed.
🛠️ Supporting Survivors – What We Can Do Better:How educators, carers, and parents can create safe spaces for young people to disclose – and why our reactions matter.
💬 Key Takeaways:
✅ Survivors don’t always look or act how you’d expect – many are high-functioning, smiling, and hiding trauma in plain sight.✅ Education is everything – when we understand grooming and trauma, we’re better equipped to spot red flags and support disclosure.✅ Stories have power – by sharing his, Jeremy is breaking shame and helping others speak their truth.
📚 Further Resources:
Something to Say Project – jeremyindika.com
Able Hub – Access resources for carers, parents, and educators at ablehub.uk
Targeting the Positive – Andy’s book on understanding and managing behaviour
⏳ Timestamps:
[00:00] – Introduction: Meet Jeremy Indika[02:25] – Jeremy’s story: Growing up and the first signs of grooming[06:00] – Why children don’t always realise they’re being abused[08:45] – Andy and Jeremy on how silence becomes survival[11:10] – The emotional confusion of being abused by someone you trust[13:40] – What prompted Jeremy to finally speak out[16:05] – The justice system: Why prosecution is so difficult[18:30] – Why male survivors especially find it hard to come forward[20:40] – What grooming really looks like – and what to watch for[23:15] – The power of listening without judgement[26:00] – What professionals and parents can do better[29:05] – Jeremy’s message to survivors: “You’re not alone”[31:00] – Final reflections and where to find more from Jeremy
📲 Connect with Us!🔗 Instagram: @AbleToCarePodcast🔗 LinkedIn: @AbleTraining🔗 TikTok: @AbleToCare🔗 Website: AbleHub.uk
🎧 Subscribe & Share!If this episode resonated with you, please subscribe, share with someone who needs to hear it, and leave us a review. Let’s build a community where stories like Jeremy’s can be heard, honoured, and used to change lives.
 

How to Manage Stressful Situations Without Losing Control: Top Tips for Caregivers and Parents

In this episode of the Able to Care Podcast, host Andy Baker explores why we sometimes react in unhelpful ways when confronted with challenging behavior. From snapping and withdrawing to going into full lecture mode, Andy breaks down the five most common default reactions and shares practical strategies to shift our responses for better outcomes.
Learn how self-awareness and small shifts in mindset can help caregivers, educators, and parents respond more positively when stress levels rise. Whether at home, at work, or in care settings, this episode will empower you to recognize your patterns and make more thoughtful choices in the heat of the moment.
💡 Sponsor Message:
This episode is proudly sponsored by Carers Card UK – the UK’s number one carers card offering discounts, support, and community connections for those who dedicate their lives to caring for others. Whether you are a paid or unpaid caregiver, Carers Card UK provides valuable benefits such as:
Discounts on gym memberships, days out, electrical goods, clothing, and more.
Access to a wellbeing hub, Carers Circle tool, and a supportive community through their app.
An ID card that you can carry with pride.
Let others know you care while taking a little care of yourself. Visit Carers Card UK to learn more and order your card today!
📝 Key Topics Covered in This Episode:
⚡ Recognizing Your Default Reactions:
Understanding why our default reactions often lead us astray.
How stress and emotional overload trigger automatic responses.
🚩 The Five Default Responses to Challenging Behavior:
Withdrawal: Shutting down emotionally or physically and avoiding confrontation.
Boundary Overdrive: Enforcing rigid rules without considering context or empathy.
Consequence Overdrive: Issuing ultimatums or excessive punishments that may not be reasonable.
Giving Up on Structure: Letting go of all rules and allowing chaos just to maintain peace.
Lecture Mode: Over-explaining and talking at someone instead of engaging with them.
🛠️ Practical Strategies for Better Responses:
Pause and Reflect: Taking a breath before reacting to assess your emotional state.
Reframe and Shift Perspectives: Moving from a control mindset to a collaborative one.
Becoming a Detective and Judge: Analyzing your own responses to understand why you reacted that way.
Finding Balance: Mixing structure with understanding to maintain healthy boundaries.
💬 Key Takeaways:✅ Self-Awareness is Crucial: Recognizing your default reactions is the first step to changing them.✅ Pause Before You React: Even a single breath can prevent escalation.✅ Collaborate, Don’t Control: Shift from imposing rules to working together for positive outcomes.✅ Reflection is Essential: Journaling and post-incident reflection help identify patterns and areas to improve.
📚 Further Resources:
Able Hub - Access exclusive content, training, and resources to help you manage stress and support others effectively.
Targeting the Positive - Discover Andy Baker's book on understanding and managing challenging behavior.
⏳ Timestamps:
[00:00] - Introduction to Default Reactions
[00:17] - Sponsor Message: Carers Card UK
[01:37] - Understanding Stress and Emotional Triggers
[03:21] - The Five Default Reactions: Withdrawal, Boundary Overdrive, Consequence Overdrive, Giving Up on Structure, Lecture Mode
[08:08] - Practical Tips for Managing Your Reactions
[12:44] - How to Build Better Self-Awareness
[15:17] - Creating a Collaborative Approach to Behavior Management
[18:02] - Final Thoughts and Takeaways
📲 Connect with Us!
🔗 Instagram: @AbleToCarePodcast🔗 LinkedIn: @AbleTraining🔗 TikTok: @AbleToCare🔗 Website: AbleHub.uk
🎧 Subscribe & Share!
If you found this episode insightful, please subscribe, share, and leave a review to help others discover how to better manage their reactions to challenging situations. Let’s create a community that supports and empowers each other!

Trauma, Autonomy, and Advocacy: Navigating PDA with Julia Daunt and Ruth Fidler

In this episode of the Able to Care Podcast, host Andy Baker sits down with Julia Daunt and Ruth Fidler, co-authors of Being Julia. Together, they explore the realities of living with Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA), how it intersects with ADHD and psychotic episodes, and the challenges of navigating life with this often misunderstood condition.
Julia shares her personal journey from childhood to adulthood, discussing the obstacles she faced and the strategies that helped her thrive. Ruth, an education consultant with over 30 years of experience, provides insight into the development of the book and the importance of advocacy for PDA.
💡 Sponsor Message:
This episode is proudly sponsored by Carers Card UK – the UK’s number one carers card offering discounts, support, and community connections for those who dedicate their lives to caring for others. Whether you are a paid or unpaid caregiver, Carers Card UK provides valuable benefits such as:
Discounts on gym memberships, days out, electrical goods, clothing, and more.
Access to a wellbeing hub, Carers Circle tool, and a supportive community through their app.
An ID card that you can carry with pride.
Let others know you care while taking a little care of yourself. Visit Carers Card UK to learn more and order your card today!
📝 Key Topics Covered in This Episode:
🌟 Understanding PDA:
What is Pathological Demand Avoidance (PDA) and why is it so often misunderstood?
The difference between PDA and other autism profiles.
Why the term "pathological" is important for understanding the profound impact of PDA on daily life.
🤯 Living with PDA – Julia’s Story:
Navigating school with PDA: Feeling “different” and being labeled as “naughty.”
The challenge of self-imposed demands and why even enjoyable activities can feel overwhelming.
How Julia's life changed once she found acceptance and understanding.
🛠️ Strategies for Supporting Those with PDA:
How to balance autonomy with support without creating pressure.
Why it’s crucial to build trusted relationships to reduce stress and encourage collaboration.
Understanding the "Demand Dial" analogy: How to synchronize external demands with individual capacity.
💡 Breaking Down Misconceptions:
Why PDA is not about being lazy or deliberately oppositional.
The impact of expectations on anxiety and avoidance.
How support systems can be built to respect autonomy while fostering positive engagement.
💬 Key Takeaways:
✅ Autonomy is Key: Offering choice and flexibility helps reduce anxiety and resistance.✅ Normalize the Experience: Understand that PDA is not a choice—it’s a neurological reality.✅ Collaborative Approach: Building relationships based on trust and partnership rather than coercion.✅ Listen and Learn: Every person with PDA is unique, and understanding their individual needs is essential.✅ Reflect on Practice: Shifting from a "fix it" mindset to a supportive, empathetic approach makes a huge difference.
📚 Guest Spotlight:
Julia Daunt - PDA advocate, public speaker, and co-author of Being Julia. Julia’s lived experience sheds light on the everyday challenges of PDA and how to thrive despite them.Ruth Fidler - Education consultant with decades of experience specializing in autism, PDA, and emotional well-being. Co-author of Being Julia and passionate advocate for person-centered support.
⏳ Timestamps:
[00:00] - Introduction and Sponsor Message
[02:19] - Julia’s Journey: Living with PDA and Misunderstood Behaviors
[12:15] - Breaking Down PDA: Myths and Realities
[21:30] - Strategies That Work: Building Trust and Offering Autonomy
[30:45] - Managing Internal Meltdowns and Self-Imposed Demands
[38:10] - The Role of Relationships in Supporting PDA
[47:20] - The Power of Language: Why "Pathological" Matters
[56:30] - Final Takeaways and How to Support Someone with PDA
📖 Further Resources:
Being Julia - Get your copy to learn more about Julia’s journey and practical strategies for PDA support.
PDA Society - A hub for resources, guidance, and community support.
Able Hub - Join the Able Hub for exclusive podcast content, training, and more.
📲 Connect with Us!
🔗 Instagram: @AbleToCarePodcast🔗 LinkedIn: @AbleTraining🔗 TikTok: @AbleToCare🔗 Website: AbleHub.uk
🎧 Subscribe & Share!
If you enjoyed this episode, please subscribe, share, and leave a review to help us reach more listeners who could benefit from these conversations. Let’s continue to build a supportive and informed community together!

Should We Praise Children? The Answer for All Parents, Teachers and Carers

In this episode of the Able to Care Podcast, host Andy Baker explores the hidden complexities of praise. While we often use praise to encourage positive behavior—whether in children, adults, or those we support in care—it can sometimes have unintended consequences. Could the way we praise actually increase anxiety, foster dependency on external validation, or even reinforce behaviors we aim to reduce?
Andy breaks down:✅ When praise works—and when it doesn’t✅ The difference between intrinsic & extrinsic motivation✅ Why overpraising can backfire✅ The best way to use praise to build confidence & autonomy
🌟 Sponsor: Carers Card UK
This episode is proudly sponsored by Carers Card UK, the UK’s leading discount and recognition card for unpaid carers. Carers deserve better, and this initiative provides:💳 An ID card for recognition and emergency support💰 Discounts on everyday essentials—from gym memberships to clothing & electronics📲 A well-being hub & community support
For less than the price of a box of chocolates a year, you can access thousands of pounds worth of discounts.
🎟 Get yours today at CarersCardUK.com using our exclusive Able to Care promo code!
Key Takeaways from This Episode
🔹 Not All Praise Is Equal – Empty praise or focusing on outcomes instead of effort can create pressure and anxiety.
🔹 Intrinsic vs. Extrinsic Motivation – Encouraging internal motivation leads to long-term positive behavior, while excessive external praise can diminish self-motivation.
🔹 Overpraising Can Reduce Confidence – Saying “You’re so smart” may discourage a child from taking risks due to fear of failure.
🔹 Feedback Beats Flattery – Instead of “Good job!” try “I love how you kept trying even when it was hard.”
🔹 Encourage Autonomy – Ask questions that help individuals reflect on their own progress, rather than always seeking validation from others.
📌 Key Timestamps
⏳ [00:00] – Introduction: The surprising impact of praise⏳ [02:21] – Why praise isn’t always helpful⏳ [04:46] – The science behind motivation & praise⏳ [06:59] – How praise can unintentionally create pressure⏳ [08:06] – Study on rewards & motivation: Why rewards can kill enjoyment⏳ [10:45] – Growth mindset & process-focused praise⏳ [14:12] – The hidden dangers of overpraising⏳ [17:35] – Encouraging autonomy instead of dependence on external praise⏳ [21:01] – The best ways to praise effectively
📩 Connect With Us on Social Media
🎧 Follow Able to Care Podcast for more insightful episodes:📲 Instagram: @AbleToCarePodcast📲 LinkedIn: @AbleTraining📲 TikTok: @AbleToCare
📩 Subscribe to our newsletter for expert insights, upcoming episodes & free resources: AbleHub.uk
📚 Want to Learn More About Behavior & Motivation?
Check out Andy Baker’s book: Targeting the Positive with Behaviors That Challenge
✅ Learn the 6-stage Target Model for behavior support✅ Develop confidence & resilience in managing challenging behaviors✅ Understand the psychology behind motivation & praise✅ Support children, caregivers, educators & professionals in behavior management
📖 Order today from online bookstores worldwide! Find the link in the description.
🔔 Enjoyed This Episode? Don’t forget to subscribe, like, and share this episode with parents, teachers, or carers who could benefit!

Trauma-Informed or Just a Trend? How to Create Real Change in Classrooms & Care Settings

In this episode of the Able to Care Podcast, host Andy Baker is joined by Dr. Karen Treisman, MBE, an award-winning clinical psychologist, author, and internationally recognized trauma specialist. Karen's work has revolutionized how trauma is understood and supported in caregiving, education, and organizational culture.
From classrooms to care systems, trauma-informed practice is often discussed—but is it truly embedded, or just another tick-box exercise? Together, Andy and Karen explore what being truly trauma-informed means and how organizations, teachers, carers, and families can move beyond the buzzwords to create real, lasting change.
 
🌟 Sponsor: Carers Card UK
This episode is proudly sponsored by Carers Card UK, the UK’s leading discount and recognition card for unpaid carers. Carers deserve better, and this initiative provides:💳 An ID card for recognition and emergency support💰 Discounts on everyday essentials—from gym memberships to clothing & electronics📲 A well-being hub & community support
For less than the price of a box of chocolates a year, you can access thousands of pounds worth of discounts.
🎟 Get yours today at CarersCardUK.com using our exclusive Able to Care promo code!
 
Key Topics Covered in This Episode:
🧠 What Does Trauma-Informed Really Mean? – Understanding the core principles beyond the label.🏫 From Classrooms to Care Homes – How trauma-informed practice impacts organizations, leadership, and frontline workers.⚖ The Biggest Myths About Trauma-Informed Practice – Is it just about being “soft” or letting bad behavior slide?🔄 The Power of Relationships in Healing Trauma – Why connection is the key to real change.💡 Practical Steps for Embedding a Trauma-Informed Culture – Small changes that can transform staff well-being and the experiences of those in care.
Key Takeaways:
✅ Trauma-informed is not just a training—it’s a culture shift.✅ It’s not about excusing behavior, but understanding and responding effectively.✅ Burnout is real—how organizations support staff well-being matters.✅ Micro-moments of human connection make a huge difference.✅ A truly trauma-informed approach benefits everyone, from children in care to the elderly in nursing homes.
Guest Spotlight: Dr. Karen Treisman, MBE
Dr. Treisman is the author of bestselling books including The Therapeutic Treasure Box and Creating Trauma-Informed Organisations. Her innovative resources and training have supported thousands of professionals in fostering trauma-aware environments.
📚 Want to Learn More?Check out Karen’s books, training, and resources ➡️ [Link in Show Notes]
Timestamps:
⏳ [00:00] – Introduction to Dr. Karen Treisman and today’s topic⏳ [02:13] – What does being trauma-informed actually mean?⏳ [06:20] – Why trauma-informed practice must go beyond individuals to organizations⏳ [10:50] – The biggest misconceptions and resistance to trauma-informed approaches⏳ [19:09] – How trauma-informed practice is expanding (or lacking) across different sectors⏳ [27:33] – Are we more disconnected than ever? The impact of modern society on relationships⏳ [38:00] – Self-care for carers and staff: How organizations can genuinely support their teams⏳ [48:00] – Dr. Treisman’s top three favorite trauma-informed activities and exercises⏳ [57:44] – Final takeaways and how to embed trauma-informed thinking in daily life
Connect with Us!
📲 Follow the Able to Care Podcast for More:🔗 Instagram: @AbleToCarePodcast🔗 LinkedIn: @AbleTraining🔗 TikTok: @AbleToCare
📩 Subscribe for Exclusive Content & Resources: [AbleHub.uk]
Looking to Create a Trauma-Informed Culture in Your Organization?
Able Training provides specialist training for care and education professionals on trauma-informed practice, behavior support, and well-being.
📞 Get in touch today to discuss your needs: [AbleTraining.co.uk]
📖 Check out Andy Baker’s Book!Targeting the Positive: A Practical Guide to Understanding and Supporting Challenging Behaviors – Now Available Worldwide!
🎧 If you found this episode valuable, please subscribe, share, and leave a review!